On the Lapsed 13

“But tortures came afterward, and severe torments threatened those who resisted.” He can complain of tortures who was overcome by tortures; he can plead the excuse of pain who was conquered in pain. Such a one can ask and say: “I wanted indeed to fight bravely, and, mindful of my sacred oath, I took up the arms of devotion and faith; but as I fought in the encounter, various tortures and long punishments conquered me. My mind stood firm and my faith strong, and my soul long struggled unmoved with the torturing pains. But when, as the savagery of the most cruel judge broke out afresh, I was already exhausted, and now the scourges tore me, now clubs bruised me, now the rack stretched me, now the claw dug into me, now the flame roasted me, my flesh deserted me in the struggle, the weakness of my inward parts gave way; not my mind but my body failed in the pain.” Such a case can quickly advance to pardon; an excuse of that kind can be pitiable. Thus the Lord once pardoned Castus and Aemilius here; thus he made those conquered in the first encounter victors in the second battle, so that those who had before yielded to the fire became stronger than the fire, and conquered by the very thing by which they had been conquered. They pleaded not with the pity of tears but of wounds, not with a lamenting voice alone but with laceration and pain of the body; blood flowed instead of weeping, and instead of tears gore ran down from their half-burned inward parts.